Dare I Make a Microbrewery Joke?

September 27, 2008

Yesterday, Skimpy forwarded me this link, and immediately changed his tagline to “2 dollars. Why didn’t I bid for Lehman Brothers?”. This sparked the following conversation.

me: Look at it this wat
*way
$2 = 93 rupees
3:26 PM
with that you could buy a hummus and pita bread
and have some change left over
would you be happier owning Lehman?

Karthik: 11 11

me: or having hummus and pita bread

Karthik: hummus

The original inspiration for using Lebanese fast food as a standard store of value came from this profound post by Kunal. Please read it.

Later on in that conversation, I brought up employee buyouts. But things quickly took a scatalogical and American-beer-bashing turn:

me: you know
4:30 PM
at two dollars, why didn’t the employees buy Lehman?

Karthik: agreer
would’ve beenfight to split the cost da
4:31 PM
2K people together put together 2$ => each guy pays 0.1 cent
how do they pay that to each other?
jai

me: in beer
4:32 PM
Karthik: dei you don’t even get half a glass of beer for 2$
so what? each guy contributes a drop or what?

me: or they can deduct it from their PF

Karthik: 11

me: axshully
American beer is piss

Karthik: 11

me: each Lehman Europe banker contributes one drop of piss

Karthik: hahahaha
that’s tough too
just one dro

me: sells it to Dick Fuld as Budweiser

It’s not that tough. They can use droppers or something.

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The Outlook for MBAs

September 16, 2008

My laziness and writer’s block resulted in Gaurav beating me to it when it came to expressing schadenfreude about all the I-bankers who’re losing their jobs. (I am of course a retail banker of repute and thus less affected.) This is just the beginning, though.  What will MBAs do at placements time when their are no longer any investment banks to lap them up at Slot Zero?

My prediction is that ITC and UB will become the hot new Slot Zero recruiters. Now that we’re in for a depression, vice is where the money is. As this Financial Times article points out, recessions and depressions only have a positive impact on the demand for things like alcohol, tobacco and gambling:

The alcohol, tobacco, gaming, and defense sectors, in aggregate, are defensive in nature and tend to outperform the broad market in periods characterized by relatively low returns and periods with relative stagnancy, or worse, in the U.S. economy.

Tragically, there is no India-specific Vice Fund, or Satan’s Portfolio, or I would be heading over to my bank branch to start my SIPs now.